Fairy+Tale+Parodies

Jack and the Giant Ginger By: Zach, Shawn, Demeco, and Bjien Once upon a time there was a boy named Jack. He was a very poor child and he was sent to sell a pig for money. He met a man on the side of the road, who said, “If you give me the pig I will give you five magic seeds!” He responded, “What is so magical about these seeds?” The man said, “They grow really tall and can help you with your problems.” Jack agreed and took the seeds home. When Jack got home his mom was furious. She yelled, “I told you to get money for the pig not seeds!” She kicked Jack out of their house and he was homeless. Jack wandered outside and planted his seeds in the ground next to his house. He sneaked back into the house and went to sleep. The next day he went to check the seeds and now it was a giant beanstalk! He yelled, “Oh My God, mom come here!” She ran over and was so happy she wasn’t even mad he came back. Later Jack went up the stalk into the sky. He found a chicken that layed golden turds. They were very valuble and Jack took the chicken. Then a giant ginger named Dereck came over and yelled, “Get off my chicken or I will eat you! Jack tried to run down with the chicken when the chicken layed a turd because Dereck grabbed Jack. Then the giant ginger burned down the beanstock and ate Jack. The giant ginger had saved his chicken and gotten a snack.

Little Red Riding Hood-Revised By: The Wolf Retold By: Amilia Yun Period 3 2/14/11 So, you know the story, Little Red Riding Hood? How the poor innocent little girl got eaten by the ‘Big, bad wolf’? Think that the wolf deserved to be chopped up? Well, think again. The ‘Big, bad wolf’ had his own side of the story, but did anyone let him share it? Of course not. And the only reason he gets to share is because the truth always deserves to come out. So, you know that “sweet” little girl that ran around in the ratty old red coat? How she adored everything and everyone else? Well, that is a very, big lie. Little Red Riding Hood hated the sweet little wolf that lived in the forest. So, when Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the forest with a basket of cakes to her grandmother, who was ill, she tried her very best to make the poor starved wolf hungry with the sweet scent of cake. Now, I don’t know about you, but I think that was a very cruel thing to do. But, of course, the woodsmen that were in the forest didn’t suspect a sweet little girl, who was picking flowers and chasing butterflies, to be up to no good. And when they saw the wolf following Riding Hood, they suspected the worst. They didn’t even stop to think that maybe, just maybe, the wolf hadn’t eaten in a week and just wanted a bite of cake. Then the wolf went up to Riding Hood and asked her very kindly, “Excuse me, Little Red? Can you please tell me where you are bringing those delicious cakes to?” “I’m going to my grandmother’s house just outside of the opposite end of the forest, little wolf!” replied Riding Hood, sarcastically, “Why do you want to know? It’s not like I’m going to give you any of them, you filthy creature! Now go away, I am already late as it is.” As Riding Hood skipped down the path, an idea went into the wolf’s mind. “Maybe, if I go to the grandmother’s house, she will give me a bite of cake!” thought the wolf, happy that he might get some cake after all. It’s a big twist, huh? Well, it only gets better from here. When the wolf got to the grandma’s house, he thought he should say he was Riding Hood, only because he knew the grandma wouldn’t let a wolf into the house. I mean, who would? So he knocked on the wooden door- knock, knock. “Hello? Who is there?” said the Grandmother in her fragile voice. As best he could, he replied “It is me, Little Red Riding Hood with a basket full of cakes!” in a girlish, squeaky voice. “Oh! Come in! The door is open!” cried the grandmother who greatly enjoyed Riding Hood’s cakes…but not necessarily her company. So when the wolf walked in, the grandmother gasped, “Wh-wh-what are you, a wolf, doing in my home?” “Oh, um, he-hello grandmother,” the wolf was twitching nervously, afraid that the grandmother might have a gun close by, “R-R-R-Riding H-H-Hood told me th-that she was going to b-b-bring you some cakes! And I asked her v-v-very nicely if I could a t-teeny tiny bite, but she s-snapped at me and called me an ug-ug-ugly creature!” “That’s horrible!” cried the grandmother, “I would most definitely give you some cake but I’m sure that Riding Hood wouldn’t like that….” “Oh! That’s perfect! I came here to ask if you could please give me some cake!” cried the wolf excitedly. “I have an idea!” exclaimed the grandmother, equally excited. “How about you dress up as me, and pretend to “eat me”? That way, you can get your bite of cake!” “Eat you?” questioned the wolf, who was, surprisingly, a vegetarian and would never eat a human, “I don’t know, grandmother. I don’t necessarily eat meat. But how about when I put on one of your dresses, you can hide under the blanket? Would that be alright with you?” “Excellent! Now we must work quickly, she’ll be here any minute now!” exclaimed Grandmother. But, what Grandmother and the wolf didn’t know was that Riding Hood was listening to their conversation and decided to play along. Just before she went up to the door, she picked up a large stick. As Grandmother and the wolf were just settling down in their rehearsed positions, Little Red knocked on the door-knock, knock! “Grandmother, open the door! I have cakes!” screamed Riding Hood. “Oh, dear, come on in!” said the real grandmother, from under the blanket, “The door is open!” When Riding Hood walked in she saw how ridiculous the wolf looked in a bonnet, spectacles and a night gown. They must’ve thought she was stupid, for thinking that the disguise would fool her. “Good afternoon, granny! I brought your favorite cakes for you! But, my, what large ears you have!” said Riding Hood, pretending to sound shocked. “Only to hear you better, my dear,” the wolf said confidently. “And, my, what large eyes you have!” sneered Riding Hood. “Only to see you better, my dear,” said the wolf. “Why is your voice so low?” asked Riding Hood said testily. “I must be catching the cold that’s going around,” said the wolf nervously “But, granny, its summer!” said Riding Hood. She hoped that the wolf would finally realize that she knew about the plan, but the wolf wasn’t going to give up so easily. “Allergies, my dear,” said the wolf. “And, my, what large teeth you have!” exclaimed Riding Hood. “Only better to eat your cakes with!” said the wolf as he lunged toward the cakes. But, Riding Hood was quicker and whacked him on the head with the large stick, knocking him out cold. “Thought you could fool me, huh? Well think again,” said Riding Hood. She then ran out the door, screamed, ran back in, tucked the wolf into bed and took her Grandmother into the closet to hide. The Grandmother knew better than to fight her granddaughter. Minutes later, a hunter walked in. “Hello? Did someone yell for help?” said the hunter cautiously. He looked around the small house. Then, he laid his eyes on the knocked-out-cold wolf, and thought he was sleeping. All of a sudden, he heard a piercing scream. “HELP! THE WOLF LOCKED MY GRANNY AND ME IN THE CLOSET! HELP!” screamed Riding Hood, with complete terror in her voice. When the hunter saved them, he took out his axe and killed the wolf. “He won’t be bothering anyone anymore, Riding Hood,” said the hunter, “My, those cakes smell delicious! Do you mind if I have teeny tiny bite?” “After you saved me and my poor granny? Of course you may!” exclaimed Riding Hood. So then, the poor old granny, the hunter, and Little Red Riding Hood all sat down and ate cake while the wolf laid on the bed, dead. So, this is the real story of Little Red Riding Hood. Does that wolf seem so bad now? So, next time you hear a little girl screaming for help, stop and think. Is she looking for trouble? Or does she really need help? Try to get both sides of the story before taking out your axe and stabbing the bad guy. Well, obviously, if the bad guy has a saw or a knife in his hand aimed at the girl, then you know to stab him, but if he’s asleep or knocked out cold, then you should wait until they wake up and hear their story. Your assumptions aren’t always right, you know.

Fairy Tale Parody Jack Lisac

Little Red Riding Hood left town on a warm spring morning. She was riding to her Grandmother’s cottage, one of the few houses that weren’t built in the usual suburban landscape. This made life difficult for a frail, old lady. Because of this, Little Red was taking baked goods to her grandmother. During the trip through the forest, Little Red could see a variety of wildlife. One of these animals, a large and powerful wolf, approached her. “How is your day?” the wolf asked cordially. Contrary to common belief, this wolf was a polite, caring individual. He had convinced the local hunters that he could live with other people. He had convinced them that he was not a threat. There was a condition to this agreement, however. If the wolf caused problems for any of the members of the town, he would be hunted. Little Red Riding Hood was a caring person, but she hated wolves. She knew that her word would come before the wolf’s story. Little Red ran into the forest and allowed the curious wolf to follow her. Little Red Riding Hood delivered the baked goods, as promised. She searched the forest, looking for a hunter who could end her wolf problem. Little Red dashed to a nearby camp and told her story. She told them that the wolf had followed her through the forest and attacked her frail, old grandmother. The hunter, having believed Little Red, pursued and killed the wolf. Little Red left the forest and continued her life. Eventually, the incident was investigated and Little Red was found guilty. Although she was thrown into prison for a long time, the truth never came out. This story is the official report that came of the incident. In the end, even the most innocent looking people can be guilty.

Molly and the Three Bears by Michael Allmandinger Hi my name is Molly and one day I met three bears ,they weren’t too happy when I went in there house. Let me tell you my story on how I got in their house and what happened. It all started last fall I was out hunting and I was out driving my 2011 ford F-450 Super Duty hulling my John Deer Gator.It helps me to hunt out in the forest ,I got My new 2011 Ford F-450 Super Duty during ford truck month. The gator I had for about 5 years and it still works pretty good. When I got to the hunting grounds there was a long line of traffic because it was the first day of hunting season for Ohio. After I waited about 40 minutes it was my turn. I pulled up and I showed the park ranger my hunting license and the park ranger checked it and said ok and let me through. When I parked my car I stepped out and I unloaded my gator from the trailer and started up my gator. I went into my pickup truck and grabbed my shotgun and I hopped into my gator and drove off on the trail into the forest. The deeper I drove in the more trees I saw and the more animals I saw. I saw rabbits, turtles, raccoons and porcupines, but not after the small animals I’m after the big animals like deer and bears. I was driving and I parked my Gator on the side of the trail. I grabbed my shotgun and I started hunting. I was walking through the forest after about an hour I did not find anything and then I realized I got lost and I could not find my way back to my Gator. I looked at my park map and it got blown away by the wind. I took out my GPS, but the batteries were dead. Then I found a house nearby and I walked over and I rang the door bell, no answer. Then I knocked on the door, no answer. Then I opened the door and walked in and I was hungry so I saw some food on the table. There were 3 pizzas. The first one I tried was to cold. The second one I tried was too hot. The 3rd one I tried was just right. I sat down and ate it and I wanted to relax. I went over in the living room and there were 3 chairs. The first one that I sat in it broke and the second one I tried it was still too small. The 3rd one I tried was just right so I turned on their brand new 3d TV and put on the 3d glasses. Then I got tired so I went up stairs and I went in the bed room. The first one was too small. The second one was still too small and the 3rd one was just right. Then I fell asleep. When the three bears came home the baby bear said “someone ate my pizza.” The Mother said “someone made a big mess.” The father bear said “someone ate my special pizza.” Then they walked over to their living room. The baby bear said “someone broke my chair.” The mother bear said “someone made a mess” The father bear said “SOMEONE TURNED ON MY BRAND NEW 3D TV!!!!!!!! That I paid 4,000 dollars for it would have been 3,000 dollars if the best buy guy did not talk me into the surround sound for 1,000 dollars more.” Then they walked upstairs the baby bear said “someone was in my bed” The mother bear said, “Someone was in my bed” and the father bear said “someone is in my bed” I woke up and I saw them I grabbed my shot gun but it was out of ammo, oh no. They looked really mad I sad listen I’m sorry about what happened ok I was crowed in my the 3 bears I hopped out the window and I ran the father bear ran after me then I saw my Gator. Oh come on it was there the whole time I started it up the father bear was still running we got 1 inch close to me I punched him in the face and he knocked out I drove back to the parking lot I packed up my Gator and all my other stuff and drove off out of the parking lot and never saw them again. The End